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Like in any committed relationship, there are going to be ups and downs in marriage. Oftentimes unrealistic expectations set newlyweds up for disappointment, and it can take a toll on even the strongest of relationships. There are many reasons why marriages don’t work out; they differ from person to person. Whether it’s due to infidelity, communication problems, or simply growing apart, marriages can end for a variety of reasons.
If you’re noticing some early warning signs in your own marriage, it’s important to pay attention and look for marriage advice guide. If you ignore the red flags, things will only get worse.
Here are 10 common signs that your marriage might be in trouble:
1. Lack of communication
One of the major signs that your marriage is heading for trouble is a lack of communication. When you’re not communicating with your spouse, it’s difficult to resolve disagreements and connect on a deeper level.
Without communication, your relationship will slowly start to unravel. In order to make your marital relationship work, you and your spouse need to be able to communicate effectively with each other. This means being able to share your thoughts and feelings openly, without fear of judgment. It also means having daily conversations, even if they’re just about your day-to-day lives.
If you’re not communicating with your spouse, take a step back and assess the situation. Why has communication broken down? Since when has this been a problem? Is there something you can do to improve things?
You might need to seek out marriage counseling or therapy in order to help get communication back on track.
2. You’re living separate lives
A lot of troubled marriages involve couples who have effectively become flatmates, sharing a house and little else. It’s not necessarily a bad thing if you and your partner have different interests and hobbies. In fact, it can be healthy for each of you to have your own space.
But if you find that you’re living separate lives and barely spending any time together, it’s a sign that your marriage is in trouble. It’s not just about the amount of time you spend together. It’s also about the quality of time you spend together.
Do you have anything in common? Do you enjoy each other’s company? If the answer to both those questions is no, it’s a sign that your marriage might be over.
3. You’re always arguing
Constant fighting is another sign that your marriage might be in trouble. All couples argue from time to time, but if you’re constantly bickering and sniping at each other, it’s a sign that something is wrong. It could be that you’re simply not compatible, or it could be an indication of deeper issues such as resentment or unresolved anger.
Arguing is not inherently bad for your marriage. In fact, it can be a healthy way to air grievances and work through differences. The key is how you argue. Are you able to resolve your disagreements in a constructive way? Or do things always end in a shouting match?
Constructive arguing can be learned, but it takes effort and patience. If you’re finding it difficult to have a healthy argument, you can get help from marriage counselors.
4. Lack of respect
Mutual respect is essential in a marriage. If you’re constantly belittling or disrespecting your partner, it’s only a matter of time before the relationship crumbles.
A lack of respect can manifest itself in many ways. Maybe you make snide comments about your spouse to your friends, or you roll your eyes when they’re talking. Maybe you interrupt them all the time, or you ignore their opinions altogether.
Whatever the case may be, a lack of respect is a major issue that can’t be ignored. If you don’t respect your partner, it’s time to start considering whether your marriage is over.
5. One or both of you had an affair
If you or your partner has had an affair, it’s a sign that there are serious problems in the relationship. Infidelity can be difficult to forgive and even harder to forget. It can also lead to a host of other issues such as trust, communication, and self-esteem.
If you’ve been unfaithful, it’s important, to be honest with your spouse and yourself. What led you to stray? Was there something lacking in your marriage? Are you willing to work on fixing things?
The good news is that many couples are able to overcome infidelity. But it takes a lot of work, and it’s not something that you can just sweep under the rug. You need to be prepared to deal with the fallout, both in the short-term and the long-term.
I’ve you’ve been cheated on and are looking for some tips on how to deal with it, check out this article: How to get over being cheated on
6. Lack of understanding
Do you feel like you’re always on different wavelengths? Are you having trouble finding common ground with your partner? If so, it’s a sign that you’ve lost touch with each other.
It’s normal for couples to grow and change over time, but it’s important to make an effort to understand each other. Even if you don’t agree on everything, it’s important to be able to see things from your partner’s perspective.
For example, let’s say your partner feels hurt when you cancel plans at the last minute. Instead of getting defensive, try to understand why they feel that way. Maybe they’re worried that you don’t value their time, or maybe they’re afraid you’re losing interest in them.
7. You’re unhappy
If you’re unhappy in your marriage, it’s a sign that something is wrong. Being unhappy in your marriage is one of the most obvious signs that it’s time to take a step back and assess things.
It’s normal for your level of happiness to fluctuate over time, but if you’re consistently unhappy, it’s a problem. If you find yourself dreading spending time with your partner, or if you’re constantly fantasizing about being single, it’s time to take a serious look at your marriage.
Staying in an unhappy relationship is only going to make you more miserable in the long run. If you’re not happy, it’s time to start considering whether your marriage is over.
8. Lack of intimacy
Intimacy is an important part of a healthy marriage. Whether it’s physical intimacy or emotional intimacy, a lack of closeness can be a major problem.
A lack of intimacy can be caused by a number of factors. Maybe you’re too busy to spend quality time with each other. Maybe you’re not getting along, and you’re not being physically or emotionally affectionate. Or maybe you’re just not compatible anymore.
Whatever the case may be, a lack of intimacy is a major issue that can’t be ignored. There are many ways to improve intimacy in a relationship. One way is by random acts of affection. If you need a little help getting started, check out this article: 8 ways to show affection to your partner
9. You don’t even try anymore
One definite sign that your marriage is most likely over is, when you don’t even try to make it work. If you’ve given up on your marriage, then there’s not much left to do.
Couples go through rough patches all the time, but if you’re not even willing to try to work things out, then it’s a sign that you’re done. If you’re not interested in counseling or communication, then it’s time to start thinking about divorce.
If you’ve given up on your marriage, it’s important to take some time to think about why. What led you to this point? Is there something you can do to change things? If not, then it might be time to move on.
10. There’s domestic violence in your marriage
If there’s domestic abuse in your marriage, get out as soon as possible. Whether it’s physical abuse or emotional abuse, domestic violence is a serious issue that should never be ignored.
You don’t have to do this on your own. It can be quite hard to get out of an abusive relationship. Especially if your partner is threatening you or controlling your finances. There are many organizations that can help you get out of an abusive situation.
The first step is to open up to people you trust about what’s going on. They can help you make a plan to leave, and they can support you through the process. If you’re not sure who to turn to, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline.
If you are experiencing any of these signs in your relationship, it is time to talk with your partner. Communication is key in any relationship; make sure that you are both on the same page and working towards the same goals. Remember, if something feels wrong, it probably is. Don’t be afraid to reach out for help – there is no shame in admitting that you need a little assistance to make things right again.
You might also be interested in: Signs you should not break up
The best breakup books that will help you heal
It’s hard to move on after a breakup. The pain, anger, and confusion can be all-consuming. If you’re struggling to recover from a breakup, here’s a list of titles that might help. From self-help books to novels, you’re sure to find something on this list that can help you get through this tough time.
- Getting Past Your Breakup: How to Turn a Devastating Loss into the Best Thing That Ever Happened to You
- How to get over anyone in few days: Breakups will never hurt like before
- Don't Text Your Ex Happy Birthday: And Other Advice on Love, Sex, and Dating
- Whole Again: Healing Your Heart and Rediscovering Your True Self After Toxic Relationships and Emotional Abuse
- After the Breakup: A Self-Love Journal: Prompts and Practices to Help You Get Over Your Ex