If you’re thinking about getting into a relationship with someone who has recently come out of a long-term relationship, you might want to think twice. This person could be using you as a rebound, and while that’s not necessarily a bad thing, it’s important to be aware of what you’re getting yourself into. In this blog post, we’ll define what a rebound relationship is, what the signs are, and why they can be harmful.
Understanding relationships is the key to having successful ones. Read our in-depth guide to learn all about the different types of relationships, attachment styles, and how you can make them work for you.
Defining rebound relationships
A rebound relationship is defined as a romantic relationship that begins shortly after the end of another relationship. The term “rebound” can refer to the act of getting into a new relationship before you’re emotionally ready, or it can simply describe the feeling of being in a new relationship after a recent breakup.
In other words, people in rebound relationships are often used as a way to forget about the feelings of grief of the previous relationship. Some people might jump into a rebound relationship because they fear being alone, while others might do it just because they feel like they need to be in an intimate relationship as soon as possible.
The ultimate goal of a rebound relationship is to help the individual forget about their previous partner and move on. However, unfortunately, rebound relationships often backfire, leaving people feeling even worse than they did before.
How long do rebound relationships last?
Rebound relationships are usually short-term relationships that people enter into shortly after coming out of a long-lasting relationship and don’t last very long. Most rebound relationships don’t have long-term potential. In fact, they usually last about six months (max).
There are some exceptions to this, of course, but rebound relationships are usually used as a way to help people get over their last relationship and move on.
8 signs of a rebound relationship
It’s easy to get swept up in the honeymoon phase of a relationship. Everything is exciting and thrilling and you just can’t believe that this person has come into your life. But sometimes, it’s important to take a step back and ask yourself whether or not this is a committed relationship or if you’re just on the rebound. There are a few key signs that can help you determine if you’re in a rebound relationship:
1. It moves too fast
One of the biggest signs that you’re in a rebound relationship is that it’s moving too fast. Things are happening so quickly that you don’t have time to process what’s going on or take things slowly. You might find yourself getting serious very quickly or even moving in together after only a few weeks. This can be a red flag that the relationship is based on something other than genuine feelings.
2. They’re still talking to their ex
If the person you’re dating is still talking to their ex, it can be a sign that they’re not over them yet. This shows that they’re not ready to commit to you and might be using you as a way to get over their previous relationship. If you’re dating someone who is still in contact with their ex, it’s important to have a discussion about what that means for your relationship.
3. You’re not a priority
In a healthy relationship, both partners should feel like they are a priority in each other’s lives. However, in a rebound relationship, it can often feel like you are secondary to the other person’s needs and wants. They might not make time for you or include you in their plans. This can be a sign that they’re not as invested in the relationship as you are.
4. There is no communication
If you find yourself in a relationship where you and your partner never really talk, chances are it’s a rebound relationship. A lot of the early excitement and newness of the relationship can make people gloss over things they would normally discuss with a partner, like what each person wants out of the relationship or differences in lifestyle. When communication starts to break down, it’s often a sign that things are moving too fast, and the relationship is probably not built to last.
5. There is no commitment
If your partner isn’t making any moves to make the relationship official, they might be rebounding. Often, when someone has just gone through a breakup, they’re not looking for anything serious. They might be trying to fill the hole that was left by their ex, and they’re doing it with someone new. If you’re not ready for a casual relationship, you might want to reconsider dating someone who is.
6. They talk about their ex all the time
If your partner can’t seem to stop talking about their ex, it’s a huge red flag that they’re not over them. Maybe they try to compare you to their ex or talk about what they did wrong in the relationship. Whatever the case may be, if your partner is constantly bringing up their ex, it’s a sign that they’re not ready to move on.
7. They compare you to their ex a lot
If your partner can’t seem to stop talking about their ex or constantly compares you to that person, it’s likely because they’re not over them yet. This isn’t healthy for either of you, so it might be time to end things before they get too complicated.
8. You feel like you’re always giving, and they’re never giving back
In a healthy relationship, both partners should feel like they’re being equally loved and respected. However, in a rebound relationship, it can often feel like you’re the only one doing the work. You might feel like you’re always the one initiating plans or conversations and that your partner never really puts in any effort. This can be a sign that they’re not really invested in the relationship and are just using you for their own needs.
Are rebound relationships healthy?
The truth about rebound relationships is that, for the most part, they are not good for your mental health. A lot of times, people enter into them without really thinking about what they want or need, and as a result, they end up getting hurt.
When you find yourself in a rebound relationship, whether you are the one who’s trying to get over their ex or the one who is being used, it’s important to take a step back and assess what is going on.
Ask yourself if you are happy and if this is the kind of relationship you want to be in. Being in a rebound relationship can take a toll on your mental health. A mental health professional can help you to sort out your feelings and figure out what is best for you.
Unfortunately, rebound relationships often end up hurting both parties involved. The reason for this is that the people in rebound relationships are not really ready to be in a relationship yet. They are still recovering from the last one and have not taken the time they need to heal emotionally. This can lead to a lot of hurt feelings and conflict down the road.
If you find yourself in a rebound relationship, it’s important to take some time for yourself before jumping into anything serious. Don’t let your emotions cloud your judgment – you want to be sure that you are making the right decision for yourself and for your new partner.
Secrets to a healthy relationship: Books every couple should read
It's no secret that a healthy relationship is key in a long-lasting and fulfilling relationship. This list of books about healthy relationships will help you learn how to communicate better, resolve conflict, and deepen your connection. From classic self-help books to more modern reads, these titles will give you the tools you need to build a strong and healthy relationship.
- Boundaries in Dating: How Healthy Choices Grow Healthy Relationships
- Love in Every Season: Understanding the Four Stages of Every Healthy Relationship
- Love More, Fight Less: Communication Skills Every Couple Needs: A Relationship Workbook for Couples
- Infidelity Recovery Workbook for Couples: Tools and Exercises to Rebuild Your Relationship
- Healthy Me, Healthy Us: Your Relationships Are Only as Strong as You Are