Relationship

13 deal breakers in any romantic relationship

Whether you're just starting out in a new relationship or you've been together for years, there are certain things that can make or break a relationship. In this blog post, we'll discuss some of the most common deal-breakers in relationships.

Relationship Expert Amy Clark October 3, 2022 • 8 minutes read
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All too often, our relationships end because of deal breakers that we either didn’t see coming or weren’t willing to confront. Whether it’s something as seemingly innocuous as different taste in music or something more serious like infidelity, deal-breakers can be a recipe for disaster. In this blog post, we’ll give you some relationship advice and explore some of the most common relationship deal breakers.

1. Dishonesty

One of the biggest relationship deal breakers is dishonesty. If you can’t trust your partner, there’s no point in continuing the relationship. Dishonesty can manifest itself in a number of ways, from lying about small things to cheating on your partner.

When you’re in a relationship with someone who is dishonest, you always have to worry about what they’re up to. You can never relax and trust that they are being honest with you. This constant distrust can be extremely damaging to a relationship.

If your partner has been dishonest in the past, it’s likely that you’ll always be suspicious of them. This can lead to a lot of arguments and resentment.

If you’re considering getting into a relationship with someone who has a history of dishonesty, think long and hard about whether or not you’re willing to deal with the consequences. Dishonesty can ruin a relationship very quickly.

2. Anger issues

When one person in a relationship has a short temper, it can be a big relationship deal breaker. This is because it can lead to arguments and fights that are often destructive and damaging to the relationship. Arguing from time to time is natural in any relationship, but when one person’s anger gets out of control, it can be very difficult to manage.

If this is a problem that you have, it’s important to work on managing your anger before trying to get into a serious relationship. This means finding healthy ways to deal with your anger, like exercise, relaxation techniques, or talking to a therapist.

3. Poor communication

This can manifest itself in a number of ways, such as not listening to your partner, not communicating your feelings effectively, or not being able to resolve conflicts. When two people can’t communicate well with each other, it leads to a lot of misunderstandings and resentment. This is especially true if there are unresolved conflicts.

If you and your partner have trouble communicating, it’s important to work on fixing this problem. This can be done by attending communication workshops or couples counseling. If you’re not able to fix the problem on your own, seeking professional help is always an option.

4. Extreme jealousy

When one person is overly jealous, it can lead to a lot of insecurity and paranoia. This can be very damaging to the relationship and can often result in arguments.

If you’re the partner who is experiencing jealousy, it’s important to try to understand why you’re feeling this way. Are you insecure about your relationship? Do you not trust your partner?

If you can’t fix the root of the problem, jealousy will continue to be a major issue in your relationship.

5. Poor hygiene

If you’re not taking care of yourself and keeping up with your personal hygiene, it’s likely that your partner won’t be too thrilled about it. No one wants to be around someone who smells bad or has bad breath.

If you have bad hygiene, it can make your partner feel like they need to take care of you, and that’s not a position they want to be in. It can also be embarrassing for them if they’re seen with you in public. Keep yourself clean and presentable, and your partner will appreciate it.

6. Your partner hates animals, and you love them.

This might not be a problem for some people, but for those who are animal lovers, it can be a major deal breaker. Suppose you’re a cat person, and your partner hates cats. Every time you try to show them a picture of your cat, they roll their eyes and make a face.

They might even say things like, “ugh, why do you have that gross animal?” This can really start to wear on you after a while, and it might be hard to continue feeling attracted to someone who doesn’t share your love of animals.

7. Infidelity

This is a big one. Cheating can be a deal breaker for many couples. If your partner has been unfaithful, it can be hard to get over that betrayal. You might feel like you can’t trust them anymore and that the relationship is doomed.

If your partner has cheated on you, it’s important to talk to them about it. Let them know how you’re feeling and what you need from them in order to move forward. If they can’t give you that, then the relationship might not be worth saving.

8. Bad manners

If your partner has bad manners, it can be a deal breaker. This might include things like being rude to waitstaff, talking with their mouth full, or not picking up after themselves.

If your partner has bad manners, it can make you feel like they don’t respect you or that they’re not good enough for you. It can also be embarrassing to be seen with them in public.

If your partner has bad manners, try to talk to them about it. Let them know that it’s important to you that they show some basic courtesy to others. If they can’t or won’t change their behavior, then you should overthink the relationship.

9. Your partner doesn’t get along with your friends and family

If your partner doesn’t get along with your friends and family, it can put a lot of strain on the relationship. Your friends and family are an important part of your life, and you don’t want to have to choose between them and your partner.

It can be really difficult to have a relationship with someone who doesn’t get along with the people you care about most. If your partner doesn’t want to try to get along with your friends and family, it might be a sign that they’re not right for you.

10. Different political views

It’s okay to have different opinions, but sometimes extremely different political views can be a deal breaker in a relationship. Suppose you’re a Democrat and your partner is a Republican. You might not be able to agree on anything when it comes to politics, and that can really put a damper on things.

Having different political views can be tough, but it’s possible to make it work if both of you are willing to compromise. If your partner is unwilling to compromise, then the relationship might not be worth saving.

If you can’t agree to disagree, then the relationship is probably not going to work. It’s important to be able to have different opinions and still respect each other.

11. One wants kids, the other doesn’t

When it comes to children, there are no compromises. If one person in the relationship wants children and the other doesn’t, it can cause a lot of tension and lead to an eventual breakup.

The partner who wants children may feel that they are not being taken seriously or that their needs are not important. They may also feel that their partner is not interested in a future together.

The partner who doesn’t want children may feel that they are being forced into something they don’t want or that their partner is trying to control them. They may also worry about the future and how having children will change their lifestyle.

12. Substance abuse

When one partner is addicted to drugs or alcohol, it can have a devastating effect on the relationship. The partner who is addicted often becomes isolated from friends and family and puts all their energy into getting and using drugs or alcohol. This can leave the other partner feeling alone and helpless.

If you’re in this situation, it’s important to get help. There are programs and support groups available for both of you.

The goal should be to get help for the addicted person and keep the relationship together. But if this is not possible, it is best to end the relationship before it becomes too damaging.

13. Abusive behavior

Abusive behavior is a big red flag in a relationship. Abuse can take many forms. Whether it’s emotional abuse or physical abuse, it’s never okay.

Emotional abuse can be just as damaging as physical abuse. It can leave the victim feeling isolated and alone. They may also feel like they are to blame for the abuse.

The effects of abuse are devastating. The victim often feels scared, helpless, and alone. They may also feel like they’re to blame for the abuse.

If you’re in an abusive relationship, it’s important to get help. There are programs and support groups available for victims of abuse.


If you notice that your partner has a lot of deal breakers, it may be time to sit down and have a serious conversation about the future of your relationship. The important thing is, to be honest with each other and communicate openly. If you can work together to address these issues, then there’s no doubt that your relationship will be stronger for it.


Secrets to a healthy relationship: Books every couple should read

It's no secret that a healthy relationship is key in a long-lasting and fulfilling relationship. This list of books about healthy relationships will help you learn how to communicate better, resolve conflict, and deepen your connection. From classic self-help books to more modern reads, these titles will give you the tools you need to build a strong and healthy relationship.

  1. Boundaries in Dating: How Healthy Choices Grow Healthy Relationships
  2. Love in Every Season: Understanding the Four Stages of Every Healthy Relationship
  3. Love More, Fight Less: Communication Skills Every Couple Needs: A Relationship Workbook for Couples
  4. Infidelity Recovery Workbook for Couples: Tools and Exercises to Rebuild Your Relationship
  5. Healthy Me, Healthy Us: Your Relationships Are Only as Strong as You Are
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Relationship Expert

Amy Clark

Amy Clark is a freelance writer who writes about relationships, marriage, and family. She has been happily married for over ten years and loves her husband and three kids. Before …

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