Dating

14 reasons why you should or should not text him first

Should you text your crush first? Well, that's a tricky question, but we're gonna help you out! Here are the top reasons why you should or should not text your crush first.

Table of contents:

When it comes to relationships, there are a lot of dos and don’ts. But one of the most common questions people have is whether or not they should text their crush first. And unfortunately, there’s no easy answer.

There are pros and cons to both texting and not texting your crush first. On the one hand, if you don’t text them, they might not even know that you like them. And, if they’re not interested, they might never even talk to you.

But on the other hand, texting your crush first can be a little bit risky. If you text him and he’s not interested, it can make things really awkward between the two of you.

So, what should you do? Just look at our reasons why you should text him first and why you should not text him first.

Reasons why you should text him first

There are plenty of great reasons why you should text him first. Most of the time, it’s best to just write him and don’t wait for too long. Playing games is, more often than not, a waste of time.

1. You don’t want to miss your chance

This is probably one of the main reasons why you should write him first. If you wait too long, he might already be taken, or he might just lose interest. And, once that happens, it can be really hard to get him back.

2. It shows that you’re interested

Another reason why you should text him first is that it shows that you’re interested in him. If you wait for him to make the first move, he might not even know that you like him. And that could lead to some really missed opportunities.

3. It starts the conversation flowing

Texting your crush first can also help to start the conversation flowing. It can be really hard to know what to say when you first meet someone. But, by texting him first, you already have a topic of conversation ready to go.

So, if you want to talk to him, why wait? Text him today!

4. It’s a great way to get to know him better

Communication is the foundation of every relationship. By texting him, you can find out more about his interests and what he’s like. And, the more you know about him, the easier it will be to talk to him in person.

5. It can make him feel special

Everybody wants to feel special. He’ll know that you took the time to write him a message and that you’re interested in getting to know him better. It can make him feel really special and appreciated.

Especially if he’s an introvert, he may enjoy texting with you more than talking. Want to know why you should date an introvert? Here’s why!

6. It’s a great way to flirt with him

Flirting is a great way to show your crush that you’re interested in him. And, by texting him first, you can start flirting right from the beginning.

But make it subtle. It’s best to leave him guessing if you’re interested in him or not.

7. It can help you build up your confidence

Texting your crush can also help you build up your confidence. If you’re shy, it can be really hard to talk to him in person. But, by texting him first, you can get used to communicating with him. And that can help you feel more confident when you finally do meet him in person.

Reasons why you should not text him first

There are also a few reasons why you should not text him first. Look closely at the reasons we list here, as they might just convince you to stick to the old-fashioned way of waiting for him to text you.

1. He is not interested

This is probably the biggest reason why you should not text him first. If he’s not interested in you, then texting him will only make things more awkward between the two of you. It’s best to just avoid that kind of situation altogether.

But this reason only applies if you’re pretty sure about his feelings. If you’re not sure, then it’s best to just text him and find out.

2. You might come across as desperate or needy

Texting your crush first can also make you come across as desperate or needy. It might give him the impression that you’re not confident and that you need him to like you.

And, no one wants to date someone who is needy and insecure.

3. You’ve just met

Another reason why you should not text him first is that you’ve just met. It’s best to give yourself some time to get to know him better before you start texting him. Otherwise, you might come across as being too eager or desperate.

4. He treats you badly

If he’s been treating you badly, then you should not text him first. It’s best to stay away from him until he starts to treat you better. Otherwise, you’ll only get hurt in the end.

5. You’re bored

If you’re bored, then you should not text him first. It’s best to find something else to do with your time. Texting him will only waste both of your time and will make him think that you’re boring as well if you don’t know what to do with your time.

6. You want to be pursued

Another reason why you should not text him first is that you want to be pursued. It’s a classic case of playing hard-to-get. And, it can work in your favor if done correctly. But if you play this game too hard, he might lose interest in you altogether.

7. He hasn’t replied to your previous texts

If he hasn’t replied to your previous texts, then you should not text him first. He might be busy or he might not have seen your messages. But, the best thing to do is to give him some time and then text him again. And, if he still doesn’t reply, then there might be something wrong, and he’s just not interested in you.

If that’s the case, it’s better to move on.


So, should you text him first? It really depends on the situation. But, in general, it’s usually best to wait for him to text you first. That way, you won’t come across as being too needy or desperate. And, you’ll also have more time to get to know him better.

But, if you’re pretty sure about his feelings and you want to start flirting right from the beginning, then go ahead and text him first. Just make sure that you do it subtly, so he’s left guessing.


The truth about dating: Books you need to read

If you’re looking for advice on how to have more success when it comes to dating, then you’ll want to check out these reads. Each can teach you something different about the process, from being more confident in yourself to reading other people’s signals correctly. So whether you’re just starting or have been dating for a while and could use help, check out these titles.

  1. Boundaries in Dating: How Healthy Choices Grow Healthy Relationships
  2. Love: The Psychology of Attraction: A Practical Guide to Successful Dating and a Happy Relationship
  3. Seriously, This Is Online Dating?: How to Love Yourself Harder and Date Smarter
  4. Single, Dating, Engaged, Married: Navigating Life and Love in the Modern Age
  5. Things You Should Already Know About Dating, You F*cking Idiot
Share this article: Facebook Pinterest WhatsApp Twitter
Share this article:

More articles you might like

People who are reading “14 reasons why you should or should not text him first”, also reading these articles:

Browse all articles