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Dating can be a nerve-wracking experience for men, especially when it comes to the first date. You’re about to meet with a beautiful person for a cup of coffee and are just hoping to make a good impression.
But with a bit of preparation and common sense, you can make the experience much more enjoyable and less stressful. We’re here to help you feel more confident on your date. In this article, you’ll find some tips that will help you have a great first date with the woman or man of your dreams.
1. Pay attention to your physical appearance
You don’t have to be a model to look good. I hear what you say – you might not have the most chiseled abs or beautiful skin, but that shouldn’t stop you from looking your best on a first date.
Shower, brush your teeth, take some time to do your hair, wear clean clothes that fit well, and look polished overall. This will make you feel more confident in yourself and help them fall for you more easily. Don’t know what to wear on a first date? We’re here to help!
As mentioned, you don’t have to be Brad Pitt to look good. Just make the best out of what you’ve got!
2. Work on your charisma
Your charisma is the ability to attract and charm other people. It’s one of the things that women find most attractive in men. If you have strong charisma, you’ll be able to make a great first impression on your date, and they’ll be more likely to want to see you again.
You can work on improving your charisma by reading books on the topic, taking social skills classes, or simply practicing by interacting with others in a variety of settings. It even helps when you talk to yourself in front of the mirror and try different techniques!
Whether you want to become more confident and talkative around others or develop your sense of humor, working on improving your charisma will help you feel more comfortable and at ease on your date. That way, you’ll more easily hit a home run. Don’t know what we’re talking about? Then you should head over here to find out what bases are in dating!
3. Be thoughtful and attentive
Think about what your date might like, and plan accordingly. When you’re on a first date, your chosen one wants to know that you care about making them feel comfortable and happy. So, try your best to achieve that!
One way to show this is by being thoughtful and attentive throughout the date. This could mean picking a nice restaurant for dinner or choosing an activity that you know they’ll enjoy, like going for a walk in the park or visiting a museum.
Being thoughtful and attentive also means showing interest in your date’s interests and being a good conversationalist. Ask them personal questions, listen carefully to what they have to say, and make sure to laugh at their jokes!
Just don’t overdo it. Most people are sensitive enough to know if you’re faking it. So try to really care and not just act as you do.
4. Don’t be too needy or clingy
Neediness and clinginess are two of the biggest turn-offs. If you’re too needy, it means you constantly need their attention and validation. This can be very suffocating for your date and is likely to push your love interest away.
On the other hand, if you’re too clingy, it means you’re always clinging onto them and never giving them space. This can also be very suffocating and is likely to scare them off.
So what’s the balance? Just be yourself! Don’t try to act like someone you’re not just to please them. And if yourself is needy and clingy, well, then it’s time to work on your confidence and self-worth!
5. Work on your self-esteem
Self-esteem is key to having a great first date. Whether you’re talking, laughing, or kissing on the couch, you need to feel good about yourself and your abilities.
If you have low confidence, it’s time to put in some work. Nobody is born shy and awkward – these are things that you can change about yourself!
Start by working on your posture, your breathing, and the way you talk to yourself. If you’re constantly putting yourself down or telling yourself that you’re not good enough, of course, you’re going to feel bad afterward!
Instead, start practicing positive self-talk and be your own best friend. When you love yourself and believe in yourself, you’ll start to impress everyone else!
6. Don’t try too hard
Trying too hard is another turn-off. If you come across as desperate or thirsty, they are likely to run in the other direction!
So what does this mean? Essentially, don’t try to do or say things just because you think it will impress then. Don’t try to be overly funny or try telling the craziest stories. Be yourself and let things flow naturally.
Also, even though you should be a bit flirty, don’t overdo it. Introduce yourself to some great flirty first date questions, so your date will be a success.
If they don’t like who you are, forget her. There are plenty of other people out there who will appreciate you for being genuine and authentic.
7. Be a gentleman
Old-fashioned manners never go out of style. Everybody loves it when men act like gentlemen, so make sure to open doors for them, pull out their chair, and let them order first.
If you want to go above and beyond, you can also surprise them with flowers or a small gift. Just don’t do anything that makes you feel uncomfortable – the goal is to make them feel special, not to show off!
8. Don’t talk about exes
Talking about your ex is a major no-no on a first date. Not only does it make you seem bitter and negative, but it also makes them feel uncomfortable.
Instead, focus on the present moment and talk about things that are relevant to your date. If she asks you about your past relationships, just brush off the question or give a brief answer – there’s no need to delve into all the details!
9. Touching
Touching is a great way to build rapport and attraction. However, you need to make sure that you’re not crossing any boundaries. If your date doesn’t seem like they want to be touched or your first approach is met with resistance, back off!
Don’t force it or try to touch them in places that are too intimate. A light touch on the arm or shoulder is usually a good way to start. If they respond positively, you can gradually move closer and get more physical. But always make sure that they are comfortable with your level of touching.
Later you can even hug – or if you two get along really well – maybe you can even kiss. But that shouldn’t be your goal on the first date. Your goal is to get to know them and have a great time together. Everything else will come in time!
But before you can kiss them, you need to find out how to kiss someone for the first time!
10. Follow up after the date
Sending a post-date text or email is always a nice touch. It shows that you’re interested in seeing them again, and it gives you an excuse to get in touch.
Just make sure not to be too clingy or needy – a simple, “I had a great time tonight, and I’d love to see you again soon” is all you need.In the best case, you’ll snag yourself a second date! Here’s a foolproof way to ask for a second date!
But before that, you need to end the date somehow. And most of the time, it’s better to end it sooner than later. Unsure of how long your date should last? Find out how long a first date should last!
11. Dealing with rejection
Of course, there will be times when things don’t go as planned. But don’t take it too personally – everyone has been rejected at some point in their lives. Just pick yourself up and try again!
Don’t become mean and aggressive, and also, don’t become visibly heartbroken. Simply give them a short reply like “No problem, maybe another time” or even just “No worries”.
That way, you come across as being confident and unbothered. And who knows? Maybe they’ll change their mind and contact you again!
And even if not, there’s no shame in getting back out there and trying again with another person. Remember, practice makes perfect!
First dates can be nerve-wracking, but they don’t have to be! Just follow these simple tips, and you’ll be on your way to landing that second date in no time.
And who knows? Maybe this will be the start of something truly special!
In the end, just relax and be yourself. It may seem like a lot of pressure to have the perfect first date, but it’s really not that complicated.
Just be honest about who you are and show your best qualities – and they’ll love you for it!
Good luck on your first date!
The truth about dating: Books you need to read
If you’re looking for advice on how to have more success when it comes to dating, then you’ll want to check out these reads. Each can teach you something different about the process, from being more confident in yourself to reading other people’s signals correctly. So whether you’re just starting or have been dating for a while and could use help, check out these titles.
- Boundaries in Dating: How Healthy Choices Grow Healthy Relationships
- Love: The Psychology of Attraction: A Practical Guide to Successful Dating and a Happy Relationship
- Seriously, This Is Online Dating?: How to Love Yourself Harder and Date Smarter
- Single, Dating, Engaged, Married: Navigating Life and Love in the Modern Age
- Things You Should Already Know About Dating, You F*cking Idiot
David Hall
David Hall is a self-taught dating expert who works as a freelance writer to help people improve their love lives. He has always been interested in dating, physical attraction, and …
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