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14 tips on dating a single mom every guy needs to hear

Are you dating a single mom and feeling a little bit overwhelmed? These 14 tips will help you thrive in your relationship.

Author picture of James Mendoza
Dating Expert James Mendoza August 29, 2022 • 8 minutes read
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Most guys would agree that at one point in their lives, they’ve said that they would never date a woman with kids. It just seems like too much work. But when you meet a beautiful and fantastic woman that just so happens to be a single mum, you might want to think twice before you write her off.

Yes, dating a single mum can be tricky. Balancing work, kids, and a social life can be hard enough for anyone, let alone someone who is trying to date as well! But today, we’re going to give you 14 tips on how to date a single mum successfully.

1. Accept the fact that your relationship will be different

1. Accept the fact that your relationship will be different

As you might already imagine, suddenly dating a woman with kids will be different from any ordinary relationship. And that’s okay! You’ll just have to get used to a few things, like always having to schedule date nights around her kids’ bedtimes or being the third wheel on family outings.

But it’s important to remember that just because your relationship will be different, it doesn’t mean it will be any less special or meaningful. In fact, it can be even more rewarding to date a single mum because you know that she’s strong, independent, and capable of taking care of herself and her kids.

2. Remember that she is more than a mom

Just because she’s a mother doesn’t mean that’s all she is. She’s also a woman with her own wants, needs, and desires. So make sure to treat her like you would any other woman you’re interested in dating.

Flirt with her, take her out on dates, and make an effort to get to know her as a person, not just a mother. She’ll appreciate it, and you might just find that there’s more to her than meets the eye.

Since many people dating single moms are in their 30s, you should check out our guide on dating in your 30s as well!

3. Don’t make promises you can’t keep

3. Don't make promises you can't keep

When dating a single mum, it’s important to be honest and upfront about your intentions. Don’t make promises that you can’t keep, like saying you’ll always be there for her children or that you’ll never get mad at them.

It’s important to be realistic and honest with her from the start, so she knows what she can expect from you.

4. Take it slow

When you’re first getting to know a single mum, it’s best to take things slow. She might not be ready to introduce you to her kids right away, or she might not want to get too serious too quickly.

So, just take things at her pace and don’t try to push things too fast. Let the relationship develop naturally and see where it goes.

5. Be patient

5. Be patient

One of the most important things to remember when dating a single mum is to be patient. She might not be able to drop everything at a moment’s notice to go on a date, or she might have to cancel last minute because her kids are sick.

It’s important to be understanding and patient when dating a single mum. If you can’t handle the fact that her kids always come first, then you’re not ready to date her.

6. Understand that her time is limited

Another important thing to remember when dating a single mum is that her time is limited. She might not be able to go out on dates as often as you’d like or she might have to end things early because her kids need her.

It’s important to be understanding and patient when dating a single mum. If you can’t handle the fact that her kids always come first, then you’re not ready to date her.

7. Accept that her children are her biggest priority

7. Accept that her children are her biggest priority

It’s just natural that a mother will always care for her children above anything else. So if you’re dating a single mum, you need to be accepting that her kids are always going to come first. They are the most important people in her life.

So, accept the fact that you’ll never come before her kids, and you’ll have to be okay with that. That doesn’t mean that she’ll never have time for you, but it does mean that you might have to take a backseat to her children sometimes. And that’s okay! Just remember to be patient and understanding.

8. Don’t try to replace her children’s father

One thing you should never do when dating a single mum is trying to replace her children’s father or act like a second mother. It’s important to remember that no matter how much you might want to be a part of her children’s lives, you can never truly replace their father.

You should also avoid trying to give them advice about their relationship with their father or telling them what he should or shouldn’t be doing. That’s not your place. Just be supportive and understanding of the situation.

9. Don’t be afraid to offer help

9. Don't be afraid to offer help

Parenting is hard work, so a helping hand is always appreciated. Whether you offer to babysit so she can have a night out or you help with homework, and school projects, any little bit of help will go a long way.

She’ll appreciate that you’re willing to step up and help out, and it will only make your relationship stronger.

10. Support her as a parent

The most important thing you can do when dating a single mum is to be supportive. Parenting is hard work, and she might need some emotional support from time to time. Be there for her when she needs to vent or just needs someone to listen.

And, of course, always be supportive of her parenting decisions. Even if you don’t agree with them, it’s best to respect her as the mother of her children.

11. Don’t discipline the children

11. Don't discipline the children

It’s not your place to discipline her children. That’s the job of their parent, not yours. So, even if they’re acting up or you don’t agree with their behavior, it’s best to just leave it to their mum to handle it.

The only exception is when she allows you to help discipline them, but even then, you should always defer to her as the parent. Of course, you can offer your opinion or advice if she asks for it, but ultimately, it’s up to her to decide how to handle her children.

12. Don’t just care about her; also care about her kids

One mistake you can make when dating a single mum is only caring about her and not her children. Yes, it’s important to build a relationship with her, but you should also try to get to know her kids and care about them as well.

They’re an important part of her life, so if you can’t show them some love and attention, then you’re not ready to date a single mum.

13. Respect her ex

13. Respect her ex

If she has an ex, it’s important to respect him as the father of her children. Even if you don’t like him, you need to be respectful of his role in her life and the lives of her children.

Avoid talking badly about him in front of her or her kids, and don’t try to get involved in any arguments or drama between them. It’s best to just stay out of it.

And if there is still lots of contact between her and her ex, you probably should try to get along with him somehow. After all, you might be seeing a lot of him in the future if things keep going well with your relationship.

14. Stay flexible

Last but not least, it’s important to stay flexible when dating a single mum. Things might not always go according to plan, and you’ll have to be okay with that. Her kids might get sick, or she might have to cancel plans last minute. That happens all the time and has nothing to do with you.

Just roll with the punches and go with the flow. If you can do that, then dating a single mum will be a breeze!

There you have it, 14 tips for dating a single mum. Just remember to be patient, understanding, and supportive, and you’ll relationship will be strong in no time.

Hopefully, these tips will help you! Good luck!

The best relationship books to help you survive and thrive

Whether single or in a relationship, it can be tough to navigate the waters of love. These books offer advice and guidance from experts and real-life couples alike, giving you the tools you need to make your relationship work. These books will surely provide some valuable insights if you are looking for a way to spice up your love life or simply learn how to better communicate with your partner.

  1. Love: The Psychology of Attraction: A Practical Guide to Successful Dating and a Happy Relationship
  2. Single, Dating, Engaged, Married: Navigating Life and Love in the Modern Age
  3. The Power of Four Bases for Relationships: Can You Hit a Home Run in a Relationship?
  4. Communication and Relationship: A Guide to Deeper Connection, Trust and Intimacy to Improve Communication and Strengthen Your Bond as a Couple
  5. Couple's Bucket List: 101 Fun, Engaging Dating Ideas
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Author picture of James Mendoza
Dating Expert

James Mendoza

James Mendoza is a freelance writer who specializes in writing about relationships, marriage, and living happily as a single. After getting through two divorces and being cheated …

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